I’ve kept myself busy busy up until
now, mostly with co-directing Camp BUILD and GLOW in the southwest. Now that it is over I am relieved, but a
little sad and honestly kind of lost. I
don’t know what to start next, but that is a different topic. South X Southwest Camp was a bit different
from other camps. Usually Camp BUILD and
GLOW are separate camps and they get together for one or two sessions at the
end of the week; maybe like a field day or guest speaker. However, in the past this has created some
problems. I’ve heard about some
incidences and first hand experienced some hostility from the girls
especially. They are separate all week
talking about topics like gender equality and domestic violence. They girls don’t necessarily know the boys
are leaning about these topics as well.
Often when they have gotten together after a week of being apart the
girls say things like “I hate the boys, I don’t want them here.” I have even heard of the girls being too
aggressive towards the boys when playing football with them. Mostly I personally witnessed at National how
much the girls shut down around the boys.
They didn’t talk much and they didn’t want to play any of the games at
field day. For their part, the boys
mostly were too out there; trying to show off for the girls. I don’t think that this is a problem, but it
did not help how the girls felt about the boys.
So for our camp we decided it was time they experienced life
together. The girls and boys still slept
apart and a few sessions (family planning, knowing your body, sexual education,
etc…) were kept separate as well, but other than that they were together for
everything. Each girl animal group had a
counterpart boy animal group. They
marched, sang, played, performed, and for the most part learned together. We thought this would bring them together in
a way that cannot be accomplished in just one day and after all gender equality
is something that men have to be a part of also. This was our message for the camp. Females: We cannot move forward alone; men
can (and MUST) be part of solution (at least until science catches up and two
women can just make another girl baby, but that won’t be for another decade or
so probably…I did not mention this at camp lol). Males: You need to be an example
to other men and part of the solution.
Honestly, although the week was stressful and busy, I think the new
model was a success. I was amazed by how
well it worked. All of us were kind of
worried that someone was going to get knocked up, but as far as we know there
were no incidences of fornication at our camp. In fact I didn’t hear about any
serious discipline issues at all. I was
also scared that with the boys there, the girls would not come out of their
shells. I was scared they would just be
quiet and shy the whole time. This was
not the case either. The girls were
almost more outgoing earlier in the week than at the camp I was at before. The girls and boys were cheering together and
dancing together. It was wonderful. There was a big focus on gender equality,
teamwork, and such in our sessions and activities, which I think helped. The campers were all happy and that was the
goal. I think it was definitely good for
them not only to spend the whole week with each other, but to get to see
Ugandan and American adults interacting with the opposite sex in a non-sexual
manner, but as friends and equals. I
even had one group of boys come up to me and ask why family planning was gender
mixed. They thought that family planning
is something that you discuss and plan with your partner and therefore the
session should be joined. I was so proud
of them! By the end of camp, there were
so many little things that made us proud of the kids. Boys making sure both boys and girls were
included in their end of week performances, girls offering random boys (not in
their group) a seat at their lunch table, both sexes laughing and having fun
together as friends and equals. It was
wonderful. A girl also wrote a poem
about the directors and mentioned in it that we all have beautiful hair…off
topic but still nice.
I think a big help to the camp was
the BPU presence. BPU is Breakdance
project Uganda. It is based in Kampala
and Masaka and is free to anyone who wants to join. They take in all kids (a lot of them
disadvantaged) and perform around Uganda dances based on social change (for
example they did one about domestic violence at our Camp). Not only did they perform for us, but they
were present as counsellors, staff, and campers. This added a new dimension and
I think got a lot of the kids out of their shells. They were such energetic outgoing people it
helped other people to be that way as well.
Plus whenever there was downtime (no matter how much you schedule/plan,
there is always downtime), they would just dance/teach other kids to
dance. I believe you can look BPU up
online for more detailed information; I just wanted to appreciate them quickly!
I hope to visit their center next time I’m in Kampala or Masaka.
One funny now/stressful at the
time/scary if you think about it thing that occurred was a guest speaker from
KIU (Kampala International University) came to help Murph with the “Knowing
your body for boys” session. We wanted
to include as many Ugandan teachers as possible without making counsellors leave
their groups all day. We figured he’d be
great! Clair has known him for awhile,
he is somehow a part of Jim’s host family (which is quite educated and
progressive as far as I can tell), and he is a counsellor for a major
university in the country who has counselled hundreds of youths. After his first session, Michael came up to
me and was like “What is with the guy who is teaching with Murph? He just like hijacked Murph’s session and is
saying crazy shit about masturbation and HIV.”
Sigh, this cannot be good. Apparently he told the children that masturbation
does all this crazy shit to their bodies, such as makes your balls sag more (“Have
you ever seen a cow whose testicles are very low? That is because he has had too much sex. It is the same with people and masturbation”)
and it is addicting (which may be true, but so is food and exercise…should we
stop eating/exercising?) and it has negative psychological effects (it releases
endorphins aka hormones that make you happy).
To be fair, masturbation is a hot topic everywhere and in a very
Christian country it can be a tricky topic.
However, Murph did not bring this up. In the first session the KIU guy
did and in other sessions, the kids asked about it. Murph handled it well; saying it is normal
and something you do in private, not even at school (they can get kicked out of
school for it). Plus, the KIU guy was
not presenting it like God doesn’t want you to do it; he presented it as
scientifically bad for you! He even said it makes sex LESS pleasurable. (In my head I was like “sir it is definitely the
opposite”) He also said that HIV can be passed through sweat and saliva; both
completely untrue and dangerous to tell people (truth: apparently if you drink
like 5 gallons of someone’s saliva you can get it). In a country where it is stigmatized already
AND people are always sweating all over each other in public transport or
whatever other situation they are squished into (or at a Camp where children
are playing together and doing teambuilding activities all day in the hot sun…)
this is not information we can afford to let spread. Clair and I pull him out of the second
session and start trying to calmly discuss what has been said with him. We were honestly more concerned with the HIV
stuff, but he was completely focused on the “science” about masturbation. He was all “look it up!” and we were like yea
we have. Plus in my head I know that
when they are told something by a teacher that is it: it is accepted as
fact. When Clair and I were told
something, we were given scientific peer-reviewed citations. We were encouraged to look at the data beyond
what our teacher told us and come to our own decision about things. Not saying one method is better than the
other, but it’s the truth. Ooo wait to
be honest, the way Clair and I were taught is much better… In the end, after Clair and I talked to him
for like 10 – 15 minutes during which both of us were trying our hardest not to
yell/punch him, Clair escorted him from the premises (and apparently talked to
him some more). I made sure to ask
Ugandans and Americans their opinion of him and it was the same. The Ugandan counsellors knew he was
outrageous and making shit up. Overall,
I see it has a funny story (and as Gomes pointed out a further reason for us to
be here!) however scary it is that this man is counselling many youths on this
topic. (I will refrain from any comments
on crazy extreme religions pushing their outrageous agenda onto innocent
Ugandans…) This was Wednesday I believe,
the day where one thing after another went wrong. We made it through though and came out
stronger!
Overall the camp was a success
despite all of the stress leading up to and during the week of camp. Honestly I don’t know that many realized how
stressed the directors were. After that
I had a wonderful rest followed by an amazing visit from Jenna filled with
Jameson, beers, cuddling, travel, Murph’s island, boneshaking, and of course
wild animals (her one request was to see a wild elephant. Accomplished,
although then the elephants wouldn’t get out of our damn way at the end of our
day)! Special thanks to my co –
directors: Kendra (Sandra), Robyna, Griffin (Mary), Clair, and Andrew. Also much thanks to all counsellors and staff
that made our lives easier and the camp a success, especially HIV testing and counselling. That day was stressful, but worthwhile. TASO: one hour for testing my ass, it took 4. Plus a tester informed me AS SHE WAS TESTING PEOPLE
that she “requires hard corns.” I told
her we didn’t have any really and then as Julia was getting tested she asked
Julia for them as well. I then told her
again that we don’t have any AND that it is extremely inappropriate for her to
be eating while testing people. Despite the stress and schedule shifting,
testing was worth it. A lot of kids just
assumed they were positive despite never being tested. As Eliza said the knowledge that you are HIV
negative is an amazing gift to give someone.
Also, positive or negative, it is better to know your status. That was our focus, not the results, but
knowing your status, getting tested.
Hopefully getting tested in that setting will give them the courage to
get tested regularly! We also encouraged
the staff to go first as examples, with 5 of the directors leading the way and
the counsellors to be the leaders of their group as well. As far as I know almost everyone got tested!
YAY SOUTH x SOUTHWEST GLOW-BUILD!
Well that’s all I have for
now. Hope you enjoyed!
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